Thoughts about happiness

I feel like I should share my earlier writing about happiness to my English readers also because then you'll know some of my thoughts before my journey to India a month ago. I was writing the post while waiting my flight to Delhi at the end of April.

Exactly two years ago I was in this same situation at the airport waiting my flight to Delhi heading toward this amazing adventure. Adventure which then was Yoga teacher training but also an adventure for self-exploration and turning inside, more simply put it was an experience that changed my life. This time it is also going to be all about yoga and of course holiday, relaxation, charging my batteries and focus my thoughts about my future.

This year for me has been filled with great turmoil. The turmoil started about the same time with my Ayurveda studies. At this point I would like to tell you how Ayurveda defines the state of health: Person whose doshas (=the three substances that are present in a person's body), agni (=digestion) and dhātus (=tissues) are in balance and whose soul, senses and mind are filled with bliss; this is a person who is healthy. According to this definition I'm not healthy. Why you might ask? Because, honestly, my soul, senses and mind aren't filled with bliss. And this certainly forces me to think what my life is like at the moment? When thinking this from happiness point of view the question I have to ask myself is: Can I honestly say that I'm happy in every aspects of my life?

It is often said that you have to travel far so you would be able see near and this is also one of themes of my trip. I'm especially interested in figuring out what kind of day to day life I want for myself. One of the best decisions I've made earlier this year was to cut back my working hours to 6 hours per day. Now if you don't yet know the background I fill in the situation a little; I have two jobs. I have my permanent so called "real" job and I also have my own business. Meaning that during the days I'm working at the office and during the evenings I'm instructing yoga as a yoga teacher or coaching clients as personal trainer. So cutting back the hours from the other job has given me more time to do other things  meaning my own business. For example I got an opportunity to teach one completely new weekly yoga class which of course makes me very happy and grateful. The change in my working hours has certainly also given me more energy, and I'm actually not feeling tired all the time anymore. BUT one question still remains, is this enough? And the biggest question on my mind is; is this job of mine taking me toward my goal in life, the thing that is my dharma? With dharma in this context I mean my purpose in life, my true passion. And of course I do know the answer to this and the answer is no. 

How come this is so hard to admit? Admitting is one quite huge thing but it's not enough though. There should also be some sort of vision of my future, a vision of what kind of everyday life I want to build for myself.  Decisions, and everything really, should also feel good, and above all, they should feel good in the heart. And if they don't feel good in the heart, there should be some other path to follow toward the goal. This is the situation I'm in at the moment in my life.  The path to the goal is not yet clear to me but I feel the answer is near. And I feel very strongly that the distance that I'm taking now, travelling far to be able see near, is the key point here right now. And I truly believe that this trip will change my whole life. I just need this time to be able to quiet the mind, listen to my heart and find the answer from within.  ❤

What about you? Are you truly happy with your life in all its aspects? ❤